...when I think I like a guy, but I am afraid it is for the wrong reasons? Can that be any more veuge? I have been pondering over this all weekend, and I have come up with no solutions. This is all very annoying, but I suppose if I want advice I should explain.
I have a friend here in Thatcher, we shall call him Frank. I knew Frank when I lived in Thatcher before I moved up to Provo. He is a great guy, so great in fact that my Dad has commented, to me personally, on how highly he thinks of Frank (my Dad never, NEVER, said anything so complimentary about any of my other guy friend or boyfriends). Frank has asked me out a couple of times, and I always enjoy myself. We tend to sit in his truck (which is beautiful, *sigh*) after our dates and talk for at least an hour, if not more. None the less, I think the main reason I like him is because I am sure I can convince him that I am the girl of his dreams (I am fairly confident that he likes me at this point, just not enough to give up his bachelorhood).
I have convinced someone before that I was the girl of their dreams, knowing full well that I could never marry them. However, with Frank, I have no such knowledge, but I really don't want to hurt his feeling. See, he is a convert and it was my cousin up here that helped convert him. Well this cousin then turned around and dropped him. Now Frank, being awesome, forgave said cousin and is still friends, but dating engages a different part of the heart. Since Frank is technically friends with the whole family, if we dated and then broke it off, it could get awkward for everyone (even the extended family here). Is wooing Frank worth all the "what ifs"?
1 comment:
Love is a Gamble. If you take the chance, You will either leave the table winning or loosing. True to the Gambling Nature, you are going to loose more than you win, and that is why you have to take a break after a bad relationship-because you can't gamble heart that you don't have.
And when you win big, you are stupid to not quit while you're a head... and by quit, I don't mean throw love away (because in this "I am making this up as I go" analogy, love/your heart is money, and it is stupid in deed to take all the money you just won and through it in the trash), but by quit, I mean quit taking chances. When you've got somethiing good, don't gamble it away(stop taking chances in that relationship), don't spend it till its gone... You take your love earnings, and you invest it into your relationship .
A wise person I cannot remember once said something along the lines of "You are the one getting married, not your parents (here, family)" I think it might have been one of my single ward Bishops... but I think they were quoting someone. Moral of the story was when it comes to getting married, YOu are the one that deals with the consequences-not your parents. YOu can't marry someone because your parents think they are right for you, and you shouldn't not marry someone who is right for you because your parents think you shouldn't. THey aren't the ones who will be living with them, raising kids with them, you are.
I think all the above applies to dating to (provided you are mature... he he he).
Dating Frank will be a gamble, but more than how it will effect your family, you need to consider how it will effect you. The important thing is that you are honest and civil when it breaks off. If he, on the other hand, choses not to be ... well then, your family chooses not to take your side, well then screw them.
As for your intentions... Being aware of what you are capable of doing with Franks heart is different than doing it. If you are enjoying what the two of you have, it is okay that he likes you more than you like him...just don't manipulate him to make him like you more. Knowing you could convince him you are the girl of his dreams is one thing. doing it is another. Keep seeing him as you are, but never be anything but who you are. resist the urge to seduce him. If you find that hanging out with him is getting less interesting, then ya, maybe you were only in it for the chase and you should back down.
I'm not yet convinced you are doing the wrong thing as much as you are simply afraid that you are capable... but I don't know the whole story.
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